Sunday, November 23, 2008
I been thinking and was telling Hubby this year didn't seem to be a very good year. Of cos there were happy events especially friends getting married but there were many unpleasant/unhappy/sad things also.
Change of management at work, some lousy ex-colleagues who left shit behind, people leaving the company or asked to leave etc. Losing of close ones though they are probably in a better and happier place without pain now. Bad luck at the recent HDB ballot results, being sick almost every 1-2mths for the entire year.
Of cos there are things I cannot do/control to make it better which I try not to ponder too much on. But there were hardly many happy events enough to cover this black cloud. However in this process, I have learned some new things and appreciate some things as well.
I learned - not to take many things for granted, spend more time and show more concern for family and friends, not to judge people too much and push them away because of the 1st impression, some people are just assholes (not a gd thing though) which I should just ignore and on auto-off mode etc.
I appreciate - someone who cooks for me because I feel like eating it, someone who bothers and remembers to record my fav shows without my asking/reminding, someone who loves me for despite my flaws and all, someone who sayangs me and still strokes my head no matter I am 20 or 26yrs old, someone who hugs me tightly when I cry, someone who taught me and tells me abt his religion despite me not being able to understand and ask loads of why, someone who doesn't try to change me or asks me to convert because I'm a free thinker, someone who holds my hand/protects me, someone who makes the effort to do many small/big things just for me, someone who still never fails to give me surprises after so many years of being together, someone who is not stingy of his "i love u, muacks, huggies" etc. You know who you are... =)
This year has been a significant year for us both. Things that have happened which might be unhappy events have brought us closer. Our first step into the future - applying for a flat. Mum has finally "recognised" and accepted us as a couple, him as a future son-in-law.
I know at times with my fiery temper, I come to hate this family. But I also know deep down in my heart, I love them too much which leads to the hatred. I am fortunate in some ways. I might not have a father, but I still have a mother. A healthy mother who takes care of some of the minor things in my life so that I don't have to worry about or take time to do. Who still loves me deep inside in her own way, though she does not show it. Who never gave up on me even though I disappointed her time and again in school or life. I still envy people who have both their mum and dad, but I am not bitter about it. I have come to terms with this ages ago and it is really ok. Pls don't say sorry when you learn that my parents are divorced donkey years ago because it is really alright for me. (Errr, though I know some people are surprised that I didn't turn out the way some people expected me to be, haha...)
Love ya, gal frens. You gals light up my life and bring many smiles and laughter into my life. =)
Love ya, Hubby... Awaiting for good news later in the day regarding the unit. =)
Brenbren at 1:38 AM
